Dialogue in the Dark

Dialogue in the Dark" was like taking a walk on the wild side of your senses. Imagine strolling through a place where even our sense of sight is on vacation! The only relief was that we had our friendly guides Nasir, Jeetendra, Pawan and Diwan and we knew we would get all the help we needed. So here we were, with your eyes wide shut off on an adventure through a world that was was dark as a black hole's backyard.

I won't say it was not a challenge for me. Dark is not my comfort zone. This event was designed not only to challenge ourselves to get out of our comforts but also as most of us would agree , it changed the way each of us perceived the world around us.

Here's a description of what typically happened. In complete absence of light, we had no choice but to rely on our other senses - touch, hearing, smell, and taste - to understand and navigate through the tunnel and further on to our tables. I was relying mostly on my teammate's four senses than mine as I tightly clutched on to her shoulder. 

You know those awkward moments when you're trying to find your way, arms flailing like a malfunctioning robot, and suddenly you encounter another lost soul doing the same goofy dance? It was indeed a spontaneous tango of confusion until our knowledgeable experts helped us settle on our seats.  

Immediately, we started to complete tasks using non-visual methods with absolute no cheating and coordinated teamwork- coordinated?? No cheating??? - we rather not discuss. We all would agree that ears were the superheroes now, working overtime to pick up every sound. We were asked to describe objects like it was a charades without the luxury of visual cues. The laughter began as our imaginative descriptions got more and more absurd. " ye aisa shape Hai jisko hum waise lagate hai" a newfound appreciation for the power of words in a world without sight. Who knew this could be so much fun?

Next, we all became scent detectives very confident of our aesthetics that we would surely crack this one with ease. What we ended up doing actually was only creative aroma analogy knowing in our hearts that we were left with a nose that's had a workout- a futile one though. And so, towards the last bit, the taste-test comedy continued, with a huge vaierty of savouries laid out in front of us. Each description more over-the-top than the last. 

And guess what? We all left with a fresh perspective, an appreciation for the world in a new light (or lack thereof), and a story to tell that starts with, "So, I once had dinner in the dark..."

It was like our senses were throwing a surprise party, and we were the guests of honor. We emerged from the dark with a newfound awareness that our friendly guides pro at handling troublesome 50 of us were visually impaired and as capable, resilient, and full of life as anyone else...or maybe more, a life with more meaning than vegging out in front of a screen and a life that values everything like a gift. 

My takeaway? A lot of patience, gratitude, value of clear communication and helping when needed, without being condescending and most importantly a break from visual stimulation.

Been there Dune that!!

 

When Ananya qualified for the Global rounds of debate to be held in June, Shikha and me decided to take this girls trip in Doha. We were excited but I won't deny i was a little stressed by my personal prejudices about visiting a dry rich country with no natural beauty and history around. Neverthless, knowing the heat, frankly we had adjusted our expectations and were prepared to limit our outdoor activities in favor of indoor attractions such as museums, malls, cafes and air conditioned cars.

But when you think of traveling to the Middle East for the first time, you cant miss recalling the desert tales of Arabian nights. Desert Safari? when temperatures were at sweltering heights and humidity is unbearable? We wondered if that was a good idea at all. We were anyways so tired after two days of non stop shopping and Ananyas's long days at Qatar National Convention Centre. However, we decided to go just because....

The guy who organized this day trip was at the hotel to pick us up. We Jumped into a luxury Land cruiser towards high sand dunes of the desert just outside the city of Doha at the Inland Sea that is an inlet of the Persian Gulf, not knowing what we were headed for.  As we drew closer to the Sea line beach, the sandy beach desert , we were taken by the stunning vistas of the natural beauty enveloping the country. On the way we stopped for a short thrilling ride over the sandy dunes of south Qatar on camel.

Post that , I wondered what our 4 x 4 professional driver, Ibrahim was doing with the tyres. He infact was deflating them to make the vehicle ready for the thrilling session of dune bashing- an authentic experience of a rollercoaster ride on the desert. Have you ever done skiing? So imagine that gliding sensation, but instead of skis, imagine you’re in a Land Cruiser, and instead of snow, imagine it’s sand. That’s what dune bashing feels like. After the camel ride which we thought was adventurous enough, we set off with seat belts. When we saw the car ahead of us, we surely assumed that the stunt went wrong as it dived down, totally naive that we are aiming directly at that dune as steep as a mountain as well. Again and again, we climbed up a dune, or roar along the side of one, and glided down a sandy slope as if it’s a run in the Golden shimmering Alps. It was absolutely exhilarating as he sped towards another crest.

Next was Sunboarding on the list. In essence, sandboarding is pretty simple but when he asked us to glide down a tall golden dune, we looked at each other in disbelief. I could recall myself preaching my kids, " Face the fear till it disappears" but at that point I wondered what that even means.  However, we did get over our fears in our own way at a pretty impressive speed while whizzing down. The speed and the glide, I am sure Shikha, Wricha and Ananya would not want me to elaborate more on it.

Hmmmmmmm.......the last bit of a fun filled day, I wondered why sunsets are more colourful in deserts. Had I asked this question to Gagan, he would have explained that drier air means more vivid color wavelengths and blah blah blah....but to me that orange patch of cloud was as orange as a Crayola crayon with a pallette of tan and yellow ochre around-  a luminescent beauty as the sun sat beneath the desert mountains, holding its breath as night fell upon the solitude, reminding me yet again that every sunset brings the promise of a new dawn. And so, I sat there in peace watching the pink sky surrender, nudging me to let go. May be I don't have to be worried as I used to be. May be I can choose to believe that I will not miss out on what's really meant for me while I watched a sloop of amber slipping away on the banks of the Golden Yellow Sea.

In Love with History....

Only One day in Athens! You gotta be kidding me! The land of philosophers like Aristotle, Socrates, king like Alexander, poet like Homer, scientist like Archimedes......There is so much to say about the legacy of which remains the foundation of western civilisation.

 

Lots more awaited us as we first headed out to 'Manhattan of Aegean' better known for the battle between Hercules and Giants of Gaia. My first impression was a little disappointing to see such an arid and dry landscape. I wondered why the world is obsessed with Mykonos. But i was to be proven wrong -  saw the most stellar sunset by the crystal clear azure waters; partied hard at Scorpios Beach club; indulged into the delicacies; Walked down the windy cobbled streets of the downtown ‘Hora’ on the west coast ; Blissfully sat by rocks alongside the sea beaming with music at night; Relished an  amazing ice cream scoop at a tavern and of course got a rocking picture by the most photographed church Pangia. Surprisingly, the same place was a world away in terms of vibe the next afternoon - calm and serene with beautiful 16th century round windmills sitting above the harbour. Oh yes!! where Shahrukh and Rani danced to the tunes of 'Tauba tum hare.....' I got one pic too!!

 

We set out for a Ferry to yet another island in the Cyclades, Santorini. The strong Meltemi northern winds blew through the ferry deck while sailing through islands of Paros and Naxos before docking at a croissant like wonderland.  I was in awe of the multicoloured cliffs  that soared out of a sea drowned volcanic crater topped by whitewashed buildings. Walking in the rains sounds crazy but that’s what we did - in and out of villages at Fira and Oia in this “tailor-made for me weather”.  The Blue and white colours of the island made me fall in love with this jewel of nature's handiwork. Who would believe that a Minoan city destroyed by a volcanic eruption would become so?

 

The very next day we set out Sailing in Aegean on the Catamaran boat around secluded bays. It was indeed the time to switch off and appreciate the stillness of the turquoise blue waters and black sand with music and barbecue. The highlight of the evening was an engaging Zorba dance beginning with slow rhythms that got faster, bringing us all to the moment of joy and in no time we all went swirling endlessly to the beats like we were born to it.  Fortunately since you are always holding hands I did not tumble down. Lolz

 

And now to my favourite part- Athens . Acropolis Hill, the highest point of the town, Parthenon, a Temple that heaves with history and archaeology. Having seen two ancient temples of Athena and Erechtheion, it was  time to lay my eyes to this lovely stone half-moon-shaped amphitheater made by Romans where they were prepping up for  a live performance that evening. Not to be missed is the Panathenaic Stadium and the view of the Parthenon from its 21st aisle and the Hadrians Library.

 

Like they say that some of the best trips include times more spent deep inside the halls of a museum. These grand buildings which are impressive in their own right take you by their awe. It was an enriching experience though too short to have visited both Archaeological museum and Numismatic museum which houses a rich precious heritage. The inscribed stone inventories only assured a forgetful me that it's not just me who needs constant notes to keep a track of things , it was very much the  way being followed since ancient ages.  The day ended with a relaxed evening walk through the vivid streets of old neighbourhood of Plaka. You can’t help but bump into the Greek Orthodox Church with Byzantine influence, totally treasured the mosaics and frescoes.

 

Next on our list was Corinth to get a view of the 6km canal which connects the Ionian sea with the Aegean sea. This also separates the Peloponnese region from the mainland. It is is considered by many to be where you will find the ‘real Greece history’. This is where the Mycenaean king resided and from where his beautiful wife eloped leading to Trojan war with the Troys.

 

Dead tired after days of non stop fun and feast, we planned a day trip to Delphi only to fulfill my daughters checklist of seeing Temple of Apollo. I have to admit that I would have been a fool though to not have given to her wishes. Besides the incredible history of this being the centre of earth and located at a point that it makes a perfect isosceles triangle with Acropolis ( Temple of Athena) and Olympia( Temple of Zeus) this place had some inner peace n beauty about it. The serene drive along the villages was an amazing experience. On the way back we stopped for lunch at Arachova, a mountainous village nestled picturesquely at the foot of Mount paranassos. An old time village with cute little shops of olive wood stuff and gorgeous warm hosts at the tiny tabled restaurants,  we had the best gourmet experience with dishes suggested by a local. The paved walls reminded me of where snow white must have found her way into the dwarfs house and decided never to leave them and go back home.

 

It seems to me that even though there were wars, there were no phones, no entertainment, the ancients had the luxury to live in the moment and the intellect to create the times ahead that we now claim to be ours. History has some fascination to me, delving into it is like reading storybooks carved in stone. Its like falling in love with an era that I can’t experience. Only imagine an idea of how world used to be. 

Nopes & Ayes!

“Mom, I qualified for the finals of Oxford Union Debate”, called Ananya when I was at work. I told her that since it’s a second Saturday she surely could manage to participate without missing out on her school. “It’s in person, Mom! and you know what I am going to Oxford.”; she exclaimed. I was zapped with the words and also quite taken by her thrill. I obviously refuted outrightly not knowing what this debate platform meant. By the way we finally did go with her team member Ansh and her Mentor Swati, after not one but many glitches which I am sure both the kiddos don’t want me to mention. Sorry, I mean young adults. 

As the largest British Parliamentary schools’ debate competition in the UK, the Oxford Schools’ Debating Competition is aimed for keen students in senior school. Contentious motions are expected to be given to the students where there is only 15 minutes preparation, with no access to the Internet or help from external parties. Students then utilise this time to structure their arguments in a cohesive manner to formulate a well-reasoned speech- clever use of word play can often come to be helpful in terms of gaining points.

The debate consists of four teams, containing two speakers each, which are divided into two sides that speak for and against the motion. Due to the style's origins in British parliamentary procedure, the two sides are called the Government and the Opposition.

When I heard the conveners explain all this to the competing teams, I suddenly looked at Ananya and Ansh, wondering as to whether they were even aware of this. And to my surprise they were. She was the Prime minister and her friend the Deputy PM in the upcoming round, and they were quite clear of their goals whether they were the opening government or closing opposition or whatever all of it was. I could only grab a chocolate to gulp it all down because I could hardly get a word of all that into my head.

Debate was well staged at the Union Poetry Room. Ananya and Ansh communicated their ideas to each other effectively. Asking the relevant POIs, giving out clear rebuttals were all keys to secure a good score in the eyes of the judges. It seemed some serious business I should tell you. I was fortunate to witness them debating seeing their cheeks fully flushed. I realized the challenge was that they were not to state their opinion. They had to position themself to win an argument, dismissing their companion’s points no matter whether they agreed or not. They were in this fight to be crowned the person most in the right.

When I saw other pro teams , I saw them talk in very militaristic language, very strong arguments- Arguments that have a lot of punch. Arguments that are right on target. The way they said ‘No, Thank you!’ to the interjections a few times and then take it up the other times, their responses made it sound like there was no possibility of negotiation on the point put forth by them. Period.

Having witnessed these budding debaters, for a moment I myself felt trapped in the bubble of feeling very right about everything.

And so at the end of it when you are not in the winning position, you do feel a level of disbelief because you feel you can just get up argue that too convincingly. Who does not want to experience the joy and delightful taste of victory after all. Winning gives us the sensation of relief after hard training for days, accompanied by the euphoria and satisfaction of proving that we are good at something.

But then like everything in life, there is also another face of the coin that we should also embrace as strongly as we do when we win…when we lose. And the fact is that You’re going to lose most of the competitions you enter. But the way to lose with style is to create possibility. To be creative... To do exemplary work that’s worth talking about.

So next time if you are losing sleep over not winning....look at the mirror and say this 

“Damn. I think that i am way too young to be getting wrinkles around my eyes." And move on to experience the next thing. Rest assured that will be only bigger than what u just did.

PS: Did I want them to win? Want- Ayes to that one but did I expect- Nopes. I expected them to experience. The whole of it and sink it down fully, engraved into their memories of formative years, never to fade out!

Benaras Diaries!!!

Hmmm, when we planned to visit with our friends, being a Shiv Bhakta, I was only keen to visit the Kashi Vishwanath temple and start my 2023 on a beautiful note, amidst other things that every tourist supposedly does as a customary thing in the city. Obviously we will take the over rated boat ride and see the Ganga aarti but whats the big deal about it? Brahmastra had only made the exaggeration even more exaggerated I thought to myself.

Anyways, when we stepped out for a late night walk to Dadhashwamedh ghat, my head did not want to believe what my heart felt. Any picture I clicked, I wondered whether it was a photograph that looked like a painting or was it a canvas that looked like a photo? Unlike the glorified movie version, the spiritual connection in this city was evident.

The entire city boasted of an ancient feel. There was a chill to the air as we walked through the colourful paved roads, dotted with rickshaw drivers, the narrow streets, peeling paint on the sandstone walls, tiny innumerable chai shops, temples in every nook and cranny, niches filled with skilled Paanwalla’s, pillared balconies with intricate jali work. At this hour the streets seemed quiet, almost serene.

Aloo-kachori, Tamatar chaat and freshly made Idlis looked super delicious. So we ventured off to find these promised tasty treats. I was impressed by how intense the operation looked at the Kaashi Chaat Bhandar, multiple hands served and even more sat behind, spooning the delicious delicacies being handed out one after the other.

Next morning, we headed to Dhamek Stupa, where Lord Buddha preached the first sermon to His five disciples after attaining enlightenment in Bodh Gaya. Veneering sandstone cylindrical structure which draws thousands of international tourists dates back to Ashokan period. Although we had more fun in being fooled by the local guide into clicking pictures with fake laughing buddha before we finally reached the aesthetically designed masterpiece.

Evening was surely much awaited. It was time to return to the waters, this time to visit Dashashwamedh Ghat for the evening Ganga aarti. Oh how could I forget! Divya would not let me move down without putting the Chandan tika with trishul on my forehead. Felt funny bigtime and yet soaked in the Varanasi charisma!!!

Anyways, we trodded down the staircases on the Ghat which lead down into the waters of the Ganga. As our boat slowly chugged along the river, stretching to around 80 odd Ghats, we were bessemerized as each ghat unfurled a different style of architecture- Old houses, Brijwasi palace, Munshi Ghat, ashrams, ornate temples, and haphazardly built homes. Our boat paused, and as the engine died down, we hovered in near silence and I sat in awe, watching on as the sky slowly turn from Prussian blue to cobalt and finally deep dark and still.

We glided back to the docks where thousands upon thousands of people were here to witness the colourful event in all its divine glory. We were near the back of the pack in our wooden boat slowly crashing into others as everyone tried to get a view of the ceremony. Thus I gave up on clicking any decent photos and settled into my seat to truly appreciate the magic of the moment. As floating candles balanced on leaves and hovered around us, I felt a clear sense of gratitude pass over me.

After the aarti, the chants and the ringing bells, before I headed back, I paused at the banks of the dark water, cool waves gently probing at my feet, and closed my eyes while I placed the leaf basket delicately into the water. I smiled contently knowing it has been more than what I had expected from this city. This was beyond magical. It was new years eve and I knew that my start had been beyond words.

Even though we missed a guided tour by Nitish at the Benaras Hindu University, I’m not going to lie; it was lot to take in. They say that traditions are age-old in this City of lights which is believed to be the centre of Earth. While for many come to bathe in The Ganga as once in a lifetime journey, for others it marks the end of their lifetime, as their ashes form on the Manikarnika Ghat and fade into the water below. If ever there was a pinch-yourself moment, this was it.

 “I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more.”