Nevertheless, She persisted.......

 

 

A quest to climb a mountain high

With a smile but a deep sigh

Beautiful dreams written in gold

But some beliefs needed to be cajoled

A foggy vision and hands tight-fisted

Nevertheless, she persisted!!!

 

Observing and absorbing every scene

Some fights within that could not be seen

Success is failure turned Inside out

Overshadowing every cloud of doubt

Mixed feelings of distrust & hope co-existed

Nevertheless, she persisted!!!

 

Things did go wrong and knew they will

With steep curves that carted uphill

Impediments that threw out of gear

Grim and thorny to see anything clear

Sometimes weary , sapped but  encrusted

 Nevertheless, she persisted!!!

 

Every journey is queer  with its twists & turns

No matter what, one is bound to learn

Looking back on the battle afterwards

Some stories cannot be put to words

She wanted to say but resisted

Nevertheless, she persisted!!!

  

Hold a little motto, say a little prayer

Nothing is too far, you are almost there

Regardless of the time it takes

Once you have resolved, you cannot shake

Only a brief soreness that subsisted

Nevertheless, she persisted!!!

For the love of Rains.....

 

 

 

The tiny raindrops dripping silently on my face

Melting my soul as my fingertips embrace

Dwindling off the dreariness bringing solace.

Putting my heart into the right place.

 

The tiny raindrops soothingly humming down

Thawing my heart as they touch the ground

Knocking my window coming unannounced

Spreading the earthy aroma  that sticks around

 

The tiny raindrops rejoicing with no fuss

Leaving its imprints on every teeny buds

Following the rhythm of breeze that it must

With unbound joy making the two of us

 

 

The tiny raindrops  drizzling from up the sky

Resounding the keynote " Never say die"

Breathe all the solitude in with a deep sigh

Relish the  placid sound of peace dropping by.

 

The tiny raindrops that may sound more insane

Have infact come back to run by again

Nothing gets better with more & more complain

That to enjoy a rainbow, you must enjoy rain

 

 

 

All I want is to be me…….

 

 

A feather Ocean full of eyes

Magical blue when these rise

Ogling at me with so much pride

Cheering high with sheer delight

 

In awe of my rainbow sheen

Crown like a Queen not often seen

Iridescent colours flair and dance

Golden plumes with a poised glance.

 

A national bird with a star

Preening myself in the barnyard

My liquid eyes whirling to life

How I wish they knew, as I sighed.

 

Helpless! I do surrender to that spell

Just like the bunch around …tells

Whispering slowly, I ask them to pause

Do not adore me just because.

 

These bare words & mindless  thoughts

Just do not help me connect any dots

Don’t just tack on handsome to me

Being flawless can get tricky to be

 

Can I just feel unadorned for once?

Simple and happy like my loved ones

A bird with beauty of its own within

Never mind the titles that I win

 

Sometimes I just like to be

Feel the sky and smell the sea

May be Glorious , symbolic of integrity

But all I want is JUST TO BE ME!!!!!

THE PERSPECTIVE

 

When the lockdown was announced in March 2020, just like pretty much everyone around, I also got myself to think as to what kind of situation are we heading for? And how will we manage to stay for so long in the house. Not wanting to go is one thing and not being able to go is another. This sounded unfair and at first like typical human behaviour, I put this all out on China.

Moving beyond who is responsible and who is not, I do wonder whether we will ever get out of this? Will this last beyond 2020? Will we live in this phobia for a few years? It sounds insane and unfair. Never has anyone seen this ever before and I don’t want to – not for so long.

Then I recalled my conversation with my Great Grandfather, who proudly mentioned how he was a part of freedom fight for India. He was only 19 years back then. He was born when the World War I ended with 22 million people dead that year. 21 years when Second World War began. 29 years at the time of Independence and by 1962 Indo China war in, he was thrilled to have a grandson. He talked about blackouts on windows at the time of Indo Pakistan 1965 war and shared narrative of how soldiers gave away their lives at the border and how fear mounted upon them each moment of bombarding from the top. In fact, smallpox which does not raise any alarms today also actually broke out like a pandemic sometime in history. Isn’t that too much for his prime youth to feel victimised? Phew!!!!

Not to say that we should just get used to these worse ways of life – living with so much distress around; being at war with other countries and coping up with new viruses. However, what I wish to share is a Perspective! A perspective which my great grandfather had when he narrated those incidents in his life. He was proud to share how he glided through such times and how tall he stands today. He had no disappointments, just lessons, experiences and optimism. He had no impatience, no rush and no expectations to change the unpleasant too soon. He had acceptance. He had the perspective that each day we are moving towards a better tomorrow. And that’s what matters.

Instead of verbalizing 2020 as the worst year in history, can we remember that our forefathers have seen even worse? Drawing the same Perspective, I was so heartened to read this children’s book by Tomos Roberts and ever since I have decided to call it the year of GREAT REALISATION.

 Let’s not forget, undeniably we all discovered a better way to life as we all slowed down and       re-focussed on “Quality” part of our existence.  It’s the time to stop whining like a spoilt brat and start doing whatever needs to be done and get through this as stronger. Tired of wearing a mask?  Don’t be fatuous and thankless.  It’s a massive test. You better come out with flying colours.

THE SHADES OF LIFE

 

Off late, I just felt like exploring my long kept DSLR camera. All thanks to Anurag Sir. When I looked at his mesmerizing pictures, I always thought that photography is about capturing the right fleeting moments and he surely was good at that. I reasoned I could try my hands on it too. Obviously, I do get it, it’s not as easy as he makes it sound. But undeniably interesting.

Obviously during this pandemic, I cannot really travel anywhere. So here I was, sitting on my terrace exploring the clear blue sky. It surely looked grand and felt serene sitting under an umbrella of the unruffled stillness.

Technically, when I was a kid, I had figured out why sky was blue?  When sunlight falls on the atoms that make up the air, some of the light bounces off and Shorter-wavelength colours, such as blue, are scattered more effectively — making this firmament look blue — while the remaining sunlight that falls to our eyes is slightly yellowed by the loss of some of its blue. Simple.

But with the sun setting down, this simplicity was seemed much more complex to me- the brilliance of colours was splendid - something so very captivating. The pink crimson rays alluded more than its literal meaning. The orange haze splashed a warm sensation onto me, and the calmness flew by with the wind making me heart stop for a second. Oh wait! Was I seeing this all from my own terrace?

The chirping birds flying like free souls through the canvas of dusk amidst the infinite azure space. These heavens-bound birdies looked so happy together relishing the play of colours from zenith to the horizon flaunting their confidence and happiness like they knew it all.

And here we are so reluctant to let ourselves be- so fearful of change- so fretful for handling any pressures. Isn’t life also the same? Don’t we get brawnier and stronger with every darkness that we sail through. Don’t we gain all the optimism to fly higher with each passing day? Don’t we just become a better version of ourselves with changing shades of life? Just a few minutes on the terrace brought in so much introspection. Bliss it was.

Straight up, even after so much reflection, I don’t know if I am yet ready to try on the newer shades. All I know is that after today, I plan to go more often to my terrace looking in peace and whenever  I sit down to tint in with my brushes next, my sky might just be pink and not blue for a change.

Reminds me of my daughter’s status that read a few days back “Great things never came from comfort zones.” Right my sweetheart I promise to take you very seriously.

I AM OLD SCHOOL

I have good manners

Not because I want to be liked

It’s because they are absolutely essential

I show respect to my elders

Not because its requested

It’s because its required

I accept my fault first

Not because I want to be nice

It’s because its no one else’s

I like to do my chores

Not because they are rewarded

It’s because I am expected

I do not answer back to my elders

Not because I am afraid

It’s because I hate to raise fingers at my seniors

I like to worship each day

Not because ritual is the question

It’s because prayers are the answers

I do not like to quit

Not because I am strong

It’s because quitting is never an option

I trust people whom I love

Not because I am silly

It’s because I have strong morals

I believe in repairing & not throwing  people or things

Not because I have a lot of time

It’s because its worth it

I still like flowers and not thumbs up

Not because I am not an influencer

It’s because they are more real

I still believe in handwritten letters

Not because I don’t like changing with time

It’s because opening an envelope is more romantic

I love real dates to Tinder

Not because I am afraid of the unknown

It’s because texting is not courting

I like to go to picnics

Not because I am not a e-athlete

It’s because fresh air & sunshine are hard to beat

I like hills, trees and small towns

Not because I cant cope with the fast life

It’s Because they are more peaceful than stone buildings

I prefer flipping an album

Not because I can’t keep a backup

It’s Because the memories seem closer in my hands

I like golden era music

Not because I am not into the new stuff

It’s Because it used to mean more

I like calling to wish birthdays

It’s because a real conversation is more profound

 Than reading a text

Yes, please and sorry are still a part of my vocabulary

Not because its good manners

It’s because doing the right thing makes you feel good

I prefer long drives to Netflix

Not because I need to get away from home

It’s because open roads make you think a lot more

I don’t swear by things

Not because it’s a bad thing

It’s because I am straightforward

I like Eye contacts while talking

Not because I am insecure

It’s because I like to pay attention

I like remembering phone numbers

Not because I don’t trust Google

It’s because there is a certain joy in dialling them

I like to write with my pencil

Not because typing is consuming

It’s because I like erasing my flawed notes

I respect the stay at home women

Not because I am more educated

It’s because one of them raised me

Some outfits never make it out of doors

Not because its scandalous

It’s Because I like to be me

I love wearing sarees

Not because I have to follow my traditions

It’s because ethnic and elegance is my favourite

I like being Old school

Not because I am old fashioned

Its because I was raised properly

BLISS IN WILDERNESS

PC: Suhaani Saraogi

Candidly, neither do I come across as a person who would love to go on a trek nor do I think I have any endurance to even try it. However, this changed until my last holiday. I realised how much I relish falling in love with the nature – it’s flowing, beautiful changing colours. How much joy it brings to me when I see the magical sky as the blazing sun retires. And how the curtain of stars is scattered across the sky and their multitude humbles me. And how the scintillating sound of water through open wide panoramic window can pour in blissful peace into me. I don’t deny I just don’t get too much of it these days in the unrelenting running around. But I totally miss it!

When I reached Queenstown, the most cool place in NZ, if I may be allowed to be a little snobbish, I just felt so low. I just knew I had to do something else besides just the adventures and night life that this place is known for. I had to explore something which brought some kind of different charm and harmony.

So spontaneously, we packed for a day trip to Glenorchy and decided to go for a trek. Sculpted with mountaneous landscape, we picked a lovely easy loop walk through the massive Beech trees. And I have nothing to boast about when I say that just a beginner’s trek drained me out and I was walking like I am an 80 year old feeling a little stunned to see the relaxed smile on others walking along. Phew !!

Never mind, I cant deny, fatigue and embarrassment were the last things that I carried back with me. That two hour trek brought me to life again. Reminding me to re-live and look around with rose coloured glasses. One thing I think I was always so good at and yet had forgotten.

Finally, pretty soon, we planned a visit to Manali. Even though we kind of like to say we went on a trek to Hampta pass, actually it was just the first leg of the path that we rambled. Had I really managed to reach Hampta pass, I would have abolutely felt no less than Sir Edmund Hillary.

Well, we planned this with my cousins and my daughters. Much to the dismay of our over enthusiasm, we read that this was something more casual than we were wanting to boast about. Serene calmness and pristine surrounding with gradual slopes seemed easy. Nevertheless, I was incredibly excited. But I didn’t realize what I was getting myself into.

For a girl who can easily thump into her own bed which has been invariably around for so many years, it was certainly a cracked thing to plan a 4km hike up the hill. Stairs would have made things easier, but there weren’t any, so trail was the only option. The journey was full of surprises and amazing scenes.

After about a km, when I looked around, it seemed like I am the only one who was struggling more than anyone else. I found myself stopping and panting for breath. Thanks to my daughter Suhaani who held my hand leading me all the way through the zig zag routes; I just managed to skid down just once.

Light rains had begun as we were trekking back followed by snow fall beautifying everything it covered. As if the divine was embracing me- a feeling that will not leave me forever. All I know is that that day, even when we were so many of us together, but a part of me was celebrating the solitude that I derived - running by me yet again that there existed goodness in life, strength in standing tall, peace in taking a breather from the virtual world.

I know I cant go back every weekend, but I take out a little time now to just sit down on the terrace and be alive. Or just log off the computer and get into my shoes and step out to Nehru Park; Hoping that once in a while right in the middle of an ordinary life, taking a walk in the trees and breathing the wild air might just bring extra ordinary bliss.